IBS Self Help and Support Group Forums - IBSgroup.org: and the days just pass.......... - IBS Self Help and Support Group Forums - IBSgroup.org

Well first off I would like to thank everyone that has commented on my other postings that it helps to know that there is someone out there that is actually on my side for once. Any ways since my last posting I have been hospitalized with extreme stomach pains and diarrhea with an vengeance. The ER doc decided to do a CAT scan and found fatty deposits on my liver and fluid in the cul da sac which I found out was the area behind the vagina which is suppose to be normal to some degree however he wanted to add an ultrasound to the tests as well and then admit me to the hospital. My mother was with me from 3 in the afternoon until 5:30 the next morning in the ER with me since they had to wait for a bed. Once they found me a bed i let her go home and my dad came to stay with me for a little while, while my mom went home and got some sleep. With in those two hours 3 doctors had come in to see me and ordered a bunch of blood work and stool samples. The nurse was completely in shock since she has never seen 12 pages of stool sample tests needing to be run. She said she has never even heard of half of the things he was running which I guess is a good thing because that means he is being thorough. Well 2 days later I was finally able to leave the hospital since it can take weeks according to the doctor for all the test results to come in and there was no point keeping me there. I had no fever and just diarrhea. What I did get back though was that my white blood cell count came back a little elevated, and some markers for the liver and inflammation did come back abnormal as well, and my b12 count is down. Leaving the hospital was a nightmare!!!! I had to put one of those huge diapers-the ones that they put on really old people in the hospital, just so I could make it home from the hospital because I was so scared I was going to go to the bathroom in my pants. When I was in the hospital i had to run down the hall to another bathroom because my room mate was in the bathroom in our room, and I had to go now!!!! I barely made it down the hall but did make it without an accident. So now I am home taking Prevalite daily which has stopped the diarrhea thank god because it got so bad that i had gotten hemorrhoids so bad!!!! I just could not take it any more. By the way the Prevalite is what the doctor had given me after I had my gallbladder out and the diarrhea became uncontrollable. I am also on 20mg of Paxil and 60mg of Cymbalta daily as well and Xanax when needed. I still can not leave the house due to the fear of not being near a bathroom and having to go right then and there and not be able to hold it in. I still have the feeling of like i constantly have to go in the rectum in area which i guess you can say is pressure, and i have bad gas. Tomorrow is the 4th of july and what am I doing you ask?? Well I am staying at home by myself with my cats because I can't leave the house and am to embarrassed to have friends over in case I have an attack. My parents are going out to dinner tonight by my family and then tomorrow with their friends, and i absolutely hate it when they go out and I am home alone. I know I can't expect them to stop their life just because I have decided to stop mine and let the fear in me win instead of trying to go out. Am I crazy for letting the fear win, or is it that I have been through the scary feeling so many times that I can not even remember what it was like to live without it. I am 23 years olds, and should be out with friends having a great time and living my life, instead I am sitting at home because I am scared I am going to have a BM in my pants. THIS IS NOT NORMAL!!!!! I really hope that on tuesday when I call the doctor for the test results they actually find something wrong with me that can be fixed and I can get back to my normal life again. Its like the fear has paralyzed me and it completely sucks!!!! SO is it really ALL IN MY HEAD???? I am starting to believe it I have heard it so much now. I was taking a summer class that I had to go to school for and had to drop because I was hospitalized and missed to many classes which almost made me not go away to school in the fall to finish up my nursing degree because I need this class in order to start. Thank God I found an online chem class that offers not only the lecture online but also the lab part as well. The school approved it and now all I have to do is hope that the school offering it lets me take it. I can not see why they wouldn't I have a 3.5 GPA. I also have to hope that the school lets me take a different orientation program since my orientation is next week and i cant get in the car and drive the 2hrs.


SO SOUND OFF PLEASE

until next time
futurenursewithibs