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Senior year

Posted by Eco , 17 April 2012 · 357 views

After registering at my new school and meeting my teachers I finally started to find hope. I was stilled scared because it was a new place with people my age that I was too embarrassed to tell my problem to. So I tried to ignore the people around me and go to class when few people would be there. What really helped me was that the teacher who was there the most also suffered from IBS and have me tips and advice or handling my problem.

Still it wasn't perfect, the drive was long, attacks where frequent and I was becoming more depressed. How was I supposed to find a job when I couldn't even go an hour without visiting the bathroom? I did get a job at but quit after two weeks when my coworkers made fun of people with diarrhea on the same day I was having attacks.

I struggled with my family who weren't always sure that I wasn't making it all up. I'm still with the same boyfriend who going on dates was hard enough. Thank God he still helps me through this.

But a school project brought me to a apprenticeship at the local vet as a groomer. That was where I found animals could be part of my therapy. It was only a few hours a day spent grooming with a wonderful teacher. I told her about my IBS and she didn't judge me for it. I just went to the bathroom when I needed to and those became less frequent because I wasn't worried about what she would think.

But that didn't help when I went to my sister's Navy graduation. Surprisingly the super long road trip wasn't too bad, I thought everything was going to be fine until graduation day came. Traffic started piling up since everyone was trying to get to the same thing. not to mention that there's extremely slow searches done by the officers. That's when it started, we were only two blocks from the place but I couldn't take it anymore, I had to get out of the car and get to the check in office ASAP. Somehow I got through the line fast enough to get through the bathroom but that was just the beginning. A military graduation is not like any graduation, it lasts for hours and the officers are really strict about people getting out of their seats given that the threat of terrorism at such an event is high. So mostly I spent the rest of the time in the bathroom. But I'll never forget my brother in laws comments about how ridiculous I was being. And how he laughed that I couldn't just hold it.

Now that her graduation was over I had mine to worry about. I still wasn't normal. I was too scared to walk so I didn't go to my own graduation and almost no graduation party. I was learning to cope but everyday was hard when I thought about everything I couldn't do, like wait in line for a roller coaster or sit through a service of church. I'm still mad about everything IBS has taken from me.

June 2017

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