Posted 18 June 2012 - 01:37 AM
Thanks Annie, its really help change my life for the better, life is too short to spend all you time focusing on fixing a problem that does not seem to really exist?? I spent hours and hours and hours of my life going over the same thoughts, until recently after spending all this time and reading what seems like hundreds of health books and self help books, and seeing literary 40(?) different healers, gurus, medince men, etc etc?? I hit a wall. This is it(my life). I was always waiting to be healthy to start living again, I just said what the #^%#, this really sucks but I can keep focusing on how much it sucks (yea I was angry) or I can try to make the best of it. The reason why it has taken me so long to find any type of acceptance was that I always figured I could some how fix it?? And yes there are many people who do get cured dont get me wrong. It just that the more I tried to heal the more sick I have become??? Paradox??? So I changed my focus from IBS to other things, again dont get me wrong every day I must think about it to some extent but as little as I can. I am still willing to try different things, but I have done just about everything that has ever been tried. My Grandma(96) is the one that helped me, she said to me one day, I can tell she doesn't care if she lives or dies anymore she said too me with the whites of her eyes showing Andrew for Gods sake man have some fun! This was a revolution for me, the God that I have always had was one of suffering, blood, death, sin, and judgement etc etc. But she used the words for Gods sake, this hit me right in the heart. I have also spent too much time worrying about the environment, poltics, world issues, etc etc etc. As I said before and will say I again I don't have a clue, but I might as well have fun( clean fun), and my life is much more enjoyable even with extreme pain, constipation etc etc. I am am 32 year old man and I never even had a intimate relationship in my whole life, I don't know how long I am going to live but it not IBS stopping me from doing this, I know many sick people who still do amazing things. So anyways off to cyber space or universe this goes, and bottom line is I write for me! Because I need to send this out into the universe, keep on the yellow brick road and I may meet some of you on our way to the wizard.