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I can't deal with this anymore...

3K views 0 replies 1 participant last post by  itsalostcause 
#1 ·
Hello all,

This problem started suddenly one day after I used the restroom because I had gas and I thought it must have been left over bowel movements. I had been forcing out tiny bowel movements (pebbles, sorry tmi) prior to this for about a month or more. Then one morning, I went, pushed out the tiny bowel movements I could, finally feeling clear as I did after this routine every day. I come into the room where everyone is, and suddenly they act as though a smell has pervaded the room. Mind you, I did strain terribly every day to get those left over bits out, and it burned sometimes. So they act as if it smells bad, and since the problem just started, I did not think it was me.

Roll forward to a week or so, I realize this happens in all the places I go, but it may be the climate, etc. So on vacation, this happens too. When I'm anxious, it gets worse. It is sudden and unexpected, and I can't control it. My rear feels moist and heated up. I think it is sweat so I wipe my rear end with a dry tissue paper every time I go to the restroom. This never used to happen before. And even if I wipe hard against the hard part of the anus (sorry Idk anatomy of that area), there is still left over soft fecal matter EVERY TIME I go the restroom. I'm guessing I leak out some fecal material which drops down from my colon...This worsens after I eat...So I hate eating around anyone. And if I exercise/sweat, I start smelling disgusting apparently. Also, my stomach randomly makes funny noises even if I am not super hungry, sounds like empty air moving around. My earlier doctor suggested taking probiotics, which I did, and I took a bacterial test, nothing came up. The probiotics didn't do anything either. I even took chlorphyll, all it did was make my bowels green.

It's been four years now, and I can't even go anywhere or sit anywhere without knowing that people think I smell. And this is due to the reactions, nose pinching, staring, even some saying "It smells like poo, God, who is that?" It's frustrating, everything was going well for me in life before that. It ruins any hope I have of making/keeping friends and the ones I do have, well... I guess I'm very lucky. And I'm scared to go to parties, etc. because I KNOW people will notice how bad I smell. This has also ruined any chance of a significant other -- although I'm surprised this person is still interested in me, and talks to me (probably because he can't smell me through a computer screen now that I have moved).

I went to a colorectal surgeon who tried to dismiss my fear of odor as "we are more sensitive to our odors than the people around us". She said she could not smell anything in the room and proceeded to do an anoscopy, which she said revealed no structural problems. I've been doing research online like crazy thinking I could have a fistula, fissure, or rectal prolapse, or hemorrhoids. But she said there was nothing. She said my symptoms of incomplete evacuation sounded like ulcerative colitis since colon problems run in my family, and recommended me to get a colonoscopy. I am getting one done in a few months, but I am so frustrated until then... My life has been turned upside down by this one aspect... which sadly is everything because people have noses and can smell.
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If it's tldr please say at least this much: If I go to the restroom one day, strain hard, and have a tiny bowel movement (pebbles), then I start to have a fecal odor/incontinence/fecal leakage problem regularly afterwards, is this is a sign of an anal fistula/fissure or rectal prolapse?
 
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