i'm sick of this!!! ugh....i'm feeling sooooo bloated--the entire day really, actually the last 2 days.i feel ugly and fat when i'm bloated, which doesn't help my self-esteem and confidence, which makes my anti-social tendencies worse...i don't want to be anti-social--but i don't really have a choice!i hate food...all thru adolescence, food was my enemy cuz i had an eating disorder and then as soon as i got that under control...ibs started--so now food is my enemy because of ibs.so, basically, i really really hate food. sometimes i like the taste, but more and more, i'll be hungry, but the thought of any foods make me nauseous and feel full (even though i didn't eat them!). it's like my body is saying 'please, please don't hurt me again!'don't get me wrong, i do eat, but i don't enjoy it. people get together and eat, as a social thing, for fun--i just can't do this, because it is not fun for me.having had an eating disorder...i'm particularly vulnerable when it comes to food, some of the old thoughts and feelings from those days are returning thanks to ibs. whywhywhy. nevermind, there is no explanation.
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whew, that's my vent!
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