Hi everyone,I'm a guy in my 30s. I've never been officially diagnosed with IBS, but I do have major chronic constipation problems and sometimes diarrhea, and I feel so alone.The problem has been exacerbated by the fact that I am currently living with my father and wife who is not understanding at all and thinks I'm making it up and just making problems for her making my constipation and poop shyness even more pronounced.I have never been "regular", I hear stories of the "normal people" who poo a couple of times a DAY (!) or take a daily morning painless, poo, well wouldn't that be nice, lol. I think I am doing good if I go once every few DAYS, and my normal is once a week, and once every two weeks has not been uncommon. Right now it's about once every few days.In the last few years, I began to develop horrible problems with constipation after I began dieting and trying to lose weight and be healthy. I've lost a significant amount of weight btw, but am still fat. Well when I was more severely obese, I had no problems to speak of pooping because I ate lots of fatty food which slid right down the system, but whenever I try to eat anything normal and/or healthy, I have SEVERE constipation, and by that I mean it must feel like a dry object the size of a watermelon passing through an area the size of a golf ball, and sometimes it gets stuck. It can be excruciatingly painful beyond belief, and whenever the constipation is that bad it is usually accompanied by blood, I assume the body's response to get the thing moved through.The usual standbys don't work for me such as fiber or prunes. Sometimes it helps "a bit". Now when I eat the so-called "bad' or "junk" foods like processed soups like spaghettios or chocolate, everything slides right outwith little pain and if anything my problem then becomes diarrhea. But then the blood disappears, so I'm thinking I probably don't have colon cancer, but perhaps a fissure or a hemorrhoid.So at this point I'm just at a loss. I feel like a freak of nature. I simply cannot eat "healthy" without excruciating painful constipation. At times, I feel like I'm lucky not to go to the hospital, it can be so painful, and afterwords my rear end can be in pain the ENTIRE rest of the day and I'm pretty much out of commission.It's gotten to the point I fast often on the theory that nothing in, nothing out.Because basically I've developed a phobia of pooping, or rather fear of constipation. I have ZERO support at home because of this, I just feel so lost.And, I'm beginning to question if the reason I'm fat is because I've never been regular. Do the thinner people just poop like multiple times a day? Is my obesity the result of food just staying in the body and being absorbed as fat?Also, am wondering if this might be an allergic reaction to multiple foods. Do I have perhaps a sugar or a white flour allergy? I heard bread was good for you, but after a constipation attack eating white bread, I read that white bread was the worst you could eat, but finding natural whole wheat bread, is difficult to find and expensive compared to the fake dyed "brown" bread cheaply available in stores chocked full of HFCS.So I was just wondering if anyone else knows what I'm talking about and perhaps has any food ideas that I can eat that are at the same time healthy, but pass as easily for me as the processed stuff, such as chocolate or kid's soups like spaghettios.I try to explain to people when they ask why I don't "eat healthy" my problem and explain that I'd rather not be excruciating pain, but it usually goes in one ear and out the other.Another problem I had was that not only were my constipated poops EXTREMELY painful, but they would frequently stop up the toilet, which was horribly embarrassing. Thankfully I solved that problem by buying wooden dowel rods sold in your local crafts store or Walmart type store and smashing the poop up into a soup. Problem solved, no more stopped up toilets, in case anyone is having this embarrassing issue. So at least that problem is solved.But the issue of the problem of voiding the food that is inside my body without horrible pain is my main concern at the moment. What do I do? I just wanna be normal and not have pain in such a basic issue.Right now lost my job, so I don't have insurance so I really can't get the problem checked out by a doctor, so I'm just lost.Other problems I have are my "use of toilet paper" to which my Asian stepmother believes I am simply stopping up the toilet with "massive TP", argh. So she actually banned me from using it (!). But I have to anyway, I refuse to throw bloodied, crappy TP in the trash, just eww. I feel like no one understands at all. And, I'm truly at the end of my rope.Any advice or words of encouragement would be appreciated. Just knowing I'm not alone would help.Anyway thanks for listening.