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I hope some of you can help me figure this out.

213 Views 6 Replies 5 Participants Last post by  peppermintpatty
I have had problems with IBS-C for over 20 years. If I have enough time on the toilet in the morning uninterruped I might have a good day once in a while. I had basically accepted that I would just have to live with it. Then a year and a half ago my faithful loving husband of 32 years had a midlife crisis and ran off with his internet girlfriend. Since stress has always been a problem you would think I would be much worse but just the opposite. I have felt better physically than I have in years! I lost 10 pounds, had almost no IBS problems and a flat tummy in spite of the tremendous stress. Here's the kicker. I have been involved with a great man for about 6 months now and guess what? My symptoms are coming back and I am gaining weight and have regained my tummy. Very depressing. Any ideas?
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That's so strange because I did that, too! When I ended my long term relationship (ALSO due to an internet thing!) I lost weight, had fewer bouts, and had more energy. Then I got into a new relationship and over the next year the IBS came back, but thankfully not as bad. It's like the more comfortable I got, the more IBS bouts I got. Weird, huh? I'm still in that relationship now and I have to say it's done wonders for my self esteem.
Yes, it's done a lot for my self esteem but I'm beginning to feel depressed because I am having all these problems again and gaining weight. I don't know how to explain all this to him. I have mentioned that I have a sensitive stomach and have to be careful what I eat but I'm afraid when I tell him how much of a problem this is he will lose interest. I can't go on trying to pretend I don't have a problem though. It's like I'm not the same person I was when he met me.
I can't help wondering that being alone (ie. no man in your live) took some pressure off as you knew you didn't have anyone else to please? You could be ill or not and it wouldn't affect anyone else. Now that you're in a new relationship, the worries and 'what ifs' are back in your mind, and thus the symptoms are returning. Just a thought...
I used to think I was nuts. My symptoms would be gone when I was going through some pretty rough times. My mothers death, my father was killed crossing the street, divorce, I left my job of over 12 years to start something new that ended up being the job from hell. Was out of work. My IBS was fine. Now I in a job that is easy. My homelife is fine, and in comes those wonderful symptoms....again.I've never been able to figure this out.
I kind of think the same thing about the "pressure" being off when I'm alone but the other stress involved was unbelievable. I don't understand why one kind of stress is worse than another when it comes to IBS. Any ideas?
Times of high anxiety in my life have curiously been ibs-free. When things are going along just fine and in a fixed routine, then the symptoms flare up. The only explaination I can come up with is that when I'm stressed and anxious I tend to eat less and thus am not exposing myself to the triggers. The medical establishment needs to quit blaming stress for every little ailment. Myself and several others are perfect examples of this. This is not to say stress does not contribute to physical ills, just that each case has to be judged on its own merits.
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