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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hey, everyone; I will not hold you long, as we all have our own issues, some of us have found relief others like mself have tired thousands of things and sometimes nothing works, I think I get so much anxiety that I am going to end up back in the hospital I make myself sick. I hate hospitals they always assume I am on drugs, I take about 9 medical drugs, I tell them each time who knows what test show up false positive can you imagine how many drugs my body has tried? I take anti-diarrheal pills almost on a daily, which at times I am sure is going to not be good for me. I Am scared to eat, go anywhere, have fun, I hate life, I got on here to vent and talk, I am sure someone has a plan for me, but I have tried everything.

I use to have three jobs about 7 years ago, then I went down to two then one, now I am 27 and I got a half of job that pays me low ball price cause I can't say much cause I can go in whenever I want but I get a set payment, its hard to find a work from home job as I had to move back in with my grandparents who are both 80 grandpa memory is all the way bad, I once had insurance but my father left Earth in 2012, and my mama can't really help, life just really sucks the pain doesn't help and nobody understands, everyone thinks I am faking or being mean for attention when in reality I just don't want to hurt. I get scared to go out have fun, date, enjoy anything, one morning i cried all day. I am trying to take my medicine, eat snacks, exercise, all the things in a lump, but it gets so hard to get going. I take so many medicines and some don't work I had to stop talking , because it was getting out of control. I just don't know what to do.

I hate hospitals they always say i have AIDS OR CANCER cause its always something wrong with my test until they see how many pills i am taking and what issues I have, I didn't quite make it for disability I also didn't have a doctor to help I live in GA so if you know any good doctors here, even just some good advice I'll take, even if you healed and I might not be your story of healing is still good to read, I might not have a will to live, but I am happy some beat the pain. Thanks for reading this long thing, sorry if spelling is off, I was crying while writing this, I hate getting on these things not sure how people will react, what things they will do or say, but hey i am alone anyway so what can hurt? Someone else might know my pain and need a ear, or see that all I am going through I am trying.

Pain, Depression, Sadness, Loney, Nausea, IBS, CRYING, BATHROOMS that all I think about daily, I have not been normal for five years when it got worse.... I try to stay upbeat though one day, I write maybe MY BOOK will get published good luck and thanks to anyone that can just offer a word of comfort or advice anything will help me, cause I just have no fight anymore....
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