[kate072666]

I am sorry...I just wanted to know if anyone else here felt the way I do. I think I might be a hypchondriac...don't think I spelled that right...but anyway...I wake up every single day feeling like there is something wrong with me...it's always a physical ailment...headache...stomachache...diareaha...heartburn...indigestion...bad stomache...just always something...it's starting to get on my nerves...I went to see a phychiatrist...then didn't like him...am seeing a clinical social worker now...like her...but is not certified to prescibe medication...i really think i need a zanax or somehting...i have phobias...anxiety very very bad...and just freak out when I am sick..which is almost everyday...and if anyone around me is sick or feels sick...it's the worst feeling in the whole world..and it makes feel like a complete idiot...it takes over my brain and i simply cannot function...please someone let me know I am not insane...I feel as though i may go crazy sometimes...i know i am really not nuts...but i hate feeling this way all the time and was just curious if anyone else did??? Thanks in advance...Kat

 

[Kathleen M.]

While the social worker can't prescribe things, maybe she can talk to your regular doctor and see if he might be willing to do the prescribing.K.

 

[kate072666]

Well, that might be an idea...thanks...and I guess if nothing else...i can see another doctor who does have a license to prescribe...thanks...Kat

 

[KellyB23]

Kat, please dont think for one minute you are on your own, when reading your post it could have been me you were talking about!! As soon as i wake in the morning i get my self in a state panicking that i will be ill, all the worrying actually makes me need the loo! I am a complete nightmare and worry about everything. However, i went to my doctor with this about 3 weeks ago and he prescribed prozac. The first week was awfull but now in my third i am feeling so much better, my bowel is behaving and i have not had one panic attack! I'm starting to feel like my old self again. If you are anything like me then you probably wont want to take anti depressants but i got to the point where i was willing to try anything. I am so glad i did. Take Care and keep your chin up xx

 

[kate072666]

Kelly, you actually made me smile...someone else like me??? That is wonderfully heartwarming...all though I am sad for you because I know it's not fun at all. The reality of it is very sad in my eyes...because I don't think I will ever get over this horrible feeling. And yes I am terrified of taking anti-depressants b/c of the side effects...like making me feel sick...i am such a baby...however my mother takes Zanax occasionally and so I would not be too scared to try that...only beacuse she does...and in very low doses...i have been givin the opportunity for other things but refused...this time I know I need something really bad...i actually missed my youngest son's football game simply because my oldest son said he felt sick...and we had to ride for 30 min. to the game...so i refused to go...terrified...and i cried the whole time they were gone...turns out he never felt sick anymore and was fine...but the thoughts of that still haunt me...i hate this and what it does to me. I am 38 yrs old and feel like a child most of my life. It is unbearable. No one in my family knows about this and none of my friends either...soryy for going on and on here...but it does help me feel better...anyway I am for sure going to try to get some help now...thanks for listening...Kat and best wishes to you too.Email me anytime Kelly...Kathryn.Thornton###rbc.com I would love to keep in touch with you.

 

[AlmostFamous]

I know how you feel. I feel like the littlest thing sets my anxiety off- even things that didn't before. Or if it did before all this, then it's ten times worst than it used to be. I got prescribed Ativan, which is in the same category as Valium apparently. I even get anxious taking the anti-anxiety pills! It's all in my mind and I have to keep telling myself "it's not real" which makes me feel insane. My doctor even said I'm my own worst enemy! The only thing I can tell you that might make you feel better is that I have gotten a little bit better over the course of the year, with the help of Hydroxyzine when I need it. But it hasn't happened overnight. Anti-anxiety meds definitely help you remember what it's like not to freak out every minute of the day. I'm hoping to train myself back into being the person I was before and eventually not depend on pills so much. But it definitely will take time.

 

[kate072666]

Well, you all certainly make me feel like i am not the only one feeling this way...thanks...i felt like I was the only one out there...when you are too embarassed to tell anyone...it makes you feel secluded...anyway thanks for all the support and advice...i guess in the next couple of days i need to try to get an appt. with someone...but another one of my problems is putting things off too...but i will do this...i am tired of living in fear all the time and scard...again thanks bunches to all of you and keep those good feelings coming...we can all use them...and if anyone needs to talk...i am hear for you also...thanks....Kat

 

[AlmostFamous]

That secluded feeling- I know that very well. So when I feel anxious about something, I call someone and vent. Sometimes I ask them to talk about their day or anything that could distract me from my current thoughts. The worst part of all this is we're supposedly the ones in control and all I feel is like I don't have control. But anyhow- it sounds like anti-anxiety meds could be something you should look into. They aren't anything to be afraid of!

 

[Guest]

You are NOT alone - thank god for this site. I had a desperate few weeks a while back and got myself into such a state that I could hardly breathe, let alone think rationally. I suppose what we all need to do is get the rest of our lives vaguely on track if thats possible, do some nice things for ourselves and hopefully IBS and all its associated horrors should take a back seat. I've got myself a very low key part-time job (my 3rd little girl has just started school and I think thats what caused this latest bout of anxiety), taken up the trumpet and started exercising gently!! All the very best to you all. Keep in touch via this board and remember, you are NOT alone.Sue, Manchester

 

[CathyW]

thank-you thank-you thank-you!!!I am fairly new to this board and have been spending a lot of time reading everything but you have just described me exactly. I was beginning to think I was losing my mind. Doing this to myself is just insane. I am really happy to know I'm not alone because that is how I feel everyday. Thank-you again and best wishes to everyone.

 

[Runningjude]

Hi, count me in too, well I was really bad last year - my 3rd youngest started school too and Suev I know this started my anxiety. I'd got so used to having her arround - going to park, library etc we had such a lovely time. Now it's all rush to school - in the school run (which is nightmarish)and I sometimes feel panicky - which starts the dreaded "d". I take St Johns wort.I think my prob is that if I don't get her to school who will?(big worry) hubby works and can't.Anyway I started thinking and feeling guilty about how much time I was thinking about ME. Now I try to think of 10 things to be thankful fot before I get out of bed each morning. I know it sounds silly but I think it calms me down and I think it's helped.Your def not alone, love jude

 

[Arch-Angel]

I'm a certified hypochondraic, every pain near my internal organs, immedately think it's cancer. I probably pay my doctor's house paymment by as many times as I go there a month. lol

 

[Guest]

All the best to all of us and here's to a really positive 2005. Sorry, sounds dead corny but have just had the most horrible news - our closest friend and our best man at our wedding has terminal, inoperable pancreatic cancer at the grand old age of 43. He has maybe weeks/days to live. Don't want to sound preachy but it kind of got my pathetic little worries into some kind of proportion.Sue

 

[Abby'smom]

I am new to this site and very relieved and comforted that I am not alone. I especially felt good to read that Emetaphobia really exists. I generally feel anxiety out of control about many things, but it intensifies when the stomach bug is going around. I agree with Kat that daily I wake up and hope there will be no physical complaints such as headache, bloating, body ache, fatigue, diarrhea with episodes of constipation making me feel like someone has their hands around my neck. Sometimes I feel lightheaded and my heart rate jumps up. Its like Im crawling out of my skin!! I know the more I worry about it the more the panic sets in. My husband is desensitized to my physical complaints so the sympathy I get is minimal. Its just the reality of our lives. I think anything we can do such as yoga, meditation, exercise and talking it out with others can always help. I am always here for all of you!!!Julie

 

[Abby'smom]

Sue Im also sorry to hear about your friend. I does bring us back to reality and slap us into a state of calm when we hear about others suffering.

 

[kate072666]

Yes, I hear you Abbey's mom...we are alot alike...sadly though...every day is a struggle...my poor little boy of 11 had D yesterday all day...and I was freaked out he would end up being sicker than just D...I was panicking...but he was fine...i had to take a xanax....but even i was still stressed...so for all the people out there who are like us...lets all pray together and hope in some time soon in our lives...it will end...God will protect us from sickness when we go to heaven...that is when I know i will feel secure....Kat

 

[tacovilla]

Kat I completely understand about the anxiety thing. Last my my hubby puked. Well after that he went right to sleep. I, on the other hand, stayed awake all night with a true panic attack. I didn't want to breathe the same air he was exahaling so I went and laid on the couch. All I could think of was Oh my God, I'm gonna be sick, Oh my God the kids are gonna be sick. My heart raced, I went to the potty with the big D three times within a few minutes of each other. (Strickly my nerves.)After I washed my hands from using the bathroom each time I got a clean washrag to turn off the water spicket and the light. I didn't want to touch anything he had touched. It was horrible. Yes, my rational side said okay, if you get sick, they'll give you medicine and you'll be fine. But it didn't help. I was literally in a panic state.I called my doc today because the anti-depressant I'm on is also not working. Well guess what, he was off today. Yep, just my luck. I do notice more and more that when I go out I'm almost obessed with not touching anything that anyone else has touched. And when I absolutely have to touch it, then I sanitize my hands. I drill my kids when they come home from school about if they washed their hands at school that day.I live in fear and I truly hate it. It's literally as if I'm a prisoner.By the way, he's fine today. And yes, I still haven't went near him because of fear.

 

[kiandra]

Dear Kat,I know what it is like to go through what you are experiencing.....my kids think that i am a professional hypochondriac because the source of pain is not visible.My friends think that I am unreliable because if I make plans I often have to call at the last moment to cancel.I have even been sacked from work because of excess sick leave.Just remember that you are a valuable person and deserve the best and it is not selfish to look after yourself when you are going through an episode.

 

[KarenP36]

Actually what we seem to have is called a somatization disorder. Type that into your search engine and read about it. I always called myself a hypochondriac too but my old doctor actually told me I had a somatization disorder. Unfortunately because I'm a medical transcriptionist, I was always creating new diseases for myself. One day I thought I had MS, the next day cancer. It was helped a lot by the Zoloft but also I learned to "talk myself down" from situations. I still get occasional flare-ups of "There's something wrong with me!!!!" but not as much as before. I was seeing a doctor constantly. It is very frustrating because when you actually have a legitimate problem your doctor and family won't take you seriously. One day when I had a gallbladder attack my sister took me to the ER. After 4 hours and some meds they sent me home. My husband was up waiting for me. He didn't even ask me what the doctors said, he was just disgusted I was "sick again" and went to bed. It was very hurtful and still angers me.

 

[kate072666]

You people are sooooooooooo wonderful and understanding...I thank you from the bottom of my heart...it is so nice to have people who understand what you are going through...noone I know here where I live knows my pain...my fears...my torture I put myself through almost every day of my life...you certainly do feel like a prisoner...and it's disgusting to feel that way...I cry alot...but always praying to the lord that this fear will stop...I know that one day it will all end...however while I am here on earth...I would only hope and pray that things will get better for all of us...my husband has been sick for 3 going on 4 days with severe D...so you talk about panic...i have been a basket case...taking my xanax regularly...it helps too...just puts me at ease...I am still scared of getting it...but not really because I am so used to having D all the time anyway...it's just if he V....which he has almost done alot with this sickness...that I would really be freaking out about...so far so good though...I am scared my kids will get it all though they have already had it before my husband...I don't want them to get it again... Kappi...hang in there...and see about some xanax if you already don't take it...you are my inspiration...because I relate to you so well...Kiandra...let your friends know that what you have is real...if they don't understand you then they are not your real friends...I have very few...but it's ok...I have all of you on here for support...Karen thanks for the info...I will for sure look that up and read up on that...sounds interesting...it would be nice to put a name to all this madness...I hope you all have a blessed day and weekend...and are free from worr...sickness..stres...anxiety...Love to you all...Kat