[molly]

Jay, well first off all, bless you for being so brave. My own symptoms can be harsh, but at least I have the option of not becoming incontinent if I�m willing to pay the price.I used to love performing on stage or being the host for the evening, introducing all the artists which to me is a sacred thing to to. Unfortunately, what I have to go through to pull it off makes stage fright seem like a warm and fuzzy feeling by comparison.I experience a variety of ibs symptoms throughout the day but every evening, regardless of what I do or don't eat, I become painfully bloated. And then I start to continuously, you know, pass gas. Sometimes it�s reeeeaally pungent. And sometimes it�s not just gas, it�s mucus, or even worse brown liquid. But I never know in advance. Well, you can imagine how terrified I am of this happening on stage. Or even when I�m just hanging out in the audience waiting to go on. So I don�t let it happen. I�ve got muscle control like you wouldn�t believe. But the price for not letting it go is severe abdominal pain, nausea, and then frantic, painful spasms that, once triggered, go on for 12 to 24 hours even after I�ve relieved myself, often triggering other symptoms along the way. Yet all the while, I�m on stage yapping away. And the weird thing is, the worse I feel the better I get. It�s like performing becomes an anesthesia. Well my most embarrassing moment could definitely be called ibs related. One night last year I was hosting for the evening. And it was a bad night. I kept running to the bathroom to practice PI (preventative incontinence). I was wearing my usual outfit, a funky shirt and home made pants. Well, one of my other ibs symptoms is that I can�t even take the slightest pressure on my abdomen. Even a loosely fitting pair of jeans or leggings will trigger severe cramps and spasms, so I make all my own pants. And mighty fine pants they are too, Indian style but with a drawstring cord instead of an elastic waistband. I call them PMS pants because they fit you 30 days a month.Anyway, the last act of the evening was just finishing up, and I was in the bathroom doing the same. And I realized I needed to hustle if I wanted to get back on stage in time for his Outro and to close up the evening. Well, I made it. But just as my feet hit the stage I became aware of a totally new sensation; my pants sliding south down my hips. I�d forgotten to tie the drawstring knot! And at that moment I realized that my true enemy wasn�t ibs; it was gravity.And in the next moment I discovered that I had muscles I�d never dreamed of. Somehow I managed to prance around the stage saying complimentary things about all the acts while maintaining muscle control on all my internal organs and simultaneously gyrating my pelvis in such a manner as to create a kind of anti-gravity hula hoop field around my pants. And then it was, �Thank you all for coming, and good night!�, and then I bunny hopped across the club and made it to the bathroom just in time.And it occurred to me that if our lives are actually a situation comedy for the gods, they certainly got their money�s worth on this episode.

 

[Guest]

Standing ovation!Molly, thanks for sharing that story with us & Jay. You have trained yourself to handle a very difficult (IBS) situation like none other. Your passionate work probably encourages the optimistic disposition you radiate. Im feeling kinda inspired (sigh)...I was trying to find the words to support Jay, and found myself inadequate

. But you have been both realistic & funny, and I appreciate your perception. After having many "close calls" from disabling D-panics,I am mentally more prepared with each near-miss. Strict diet will help me "play by the rules" of IBS & if this fails, I will clean up, dust off & start all over again. Not simple by any means as emotional resilience is the hardest part.

 

[Guest]

Well Molly and Jay I guess since you opened up about this I can. I have had 4 of these moments but the worst and most embarrassing was the first one. I was at work lets just say I am the Public relations field, I have to go to customer houses on a daily basis. Well this day I had to park about 40 yrds out at the road due to a gate that was blocked by several cars so I walked to the house thinking I would only be there a moment. I ring the door bell and the cust says come on in so once inside I was met by probably 20 people( I dont do good in crowds) so immediately I start getting anxious the customer starts in about her problem and she had several which was making it very hard on me I staarted getting cramps and I new I had to hurry so trying not to rude I told her I had to go to the office for something and would be back. So I am doing my best to have good muscle conrtrol and get out of there. So once outside I start back to the truck when out of nowhere a huge rotwieler dog comes out of the bushes all I could see was teeth and slobber so wondering wether or not to panic and run like hell knowing if I did I would have an accident well I done my best Charlie Chan run back to the truck but he was on tail (literaly) so busted into a full run losing control of all body functions and just as was fixing to leap onto a car that I was near the dog caught me by the back of my leg took a good hunk out and most of pants during all this everybody in the house was headed towards me to help and all can think is just go back leave me alone, they got the dog under control and are apologising to hi heaven and im trying to find a way to get to the truck without them seeing what I had done didnt work there was no hiding the fact. To this day I bet they tell this story of how there big bad dog scared the s--t out me.

------------------alpo

 

[molly]

I tend to hide out in books (trying to achieve an Out Of IBS Experience) and lately I've been reading a lot of true life adventure biographies. There was one about a man who spent a year alone in the Arctic, and another one about a girl who sailed around the world singlehanded. But I think you guys are the bravest. The people who wrote those books all admited that they had something they just had to prove. But if you can pick yourself up after a humilating experience and keep on going, even though you know perfectly well that you could be heading for straight for another dignity crumpling moment, then there's nothing you need to prove.

 

[Guest]

Well you can call it brave but I personaly dont want to ever repeat it again and I go to extremes to try not to. It does make you grow a little more in inside and even now I can laugh about it and do but I wouldnt do it again even if meant curing this IBS problem.------------------alpo

 

[Bill]

Guys, a light just came on in my head! I think one reason there are so many nice people on these lists is the general humility. And its these kinds of experiences that make us that way.I wish I could point to a single "most" embarassing moment for me, too, but when you've had it for 30 years, you get *real* humble

Anyway, when I first found these boards with other people that actually understood what I had been going through, it was overwhelming! It sure helps to be able to talk about this kinda stuff and know you're not alone. Thanks for sharing.

 

[molly]

Alpo, I hear you man. But still you should give yourself credit.Bill, I think I understand what you mean. IBS certainly has a way of rearranging your personality, and your perceptions. I mean, there are times when I just HAVE to feel as lousy emotionally as I am feeling physically. Like, my psyche can't take the decrepency between an IBS flare up and a silver lining. But I have also found that, in the 9 years since I got IBS, the moments in my life when I'm feeling good have become fewer and fewer, but when I'm experiencing these better moments I recognize them, and appreciate them, and completely enjoy them.Meanwhile I am surrounded by non IBS sufferers who walk around completely clueless to the fact that their days are one long string of painless moments.When it comes to happiness, I'm a real cheap date.

 

[Guest]

Ah, these stories are so heart warming. I'll never forget the time when I was pregnant with my second son and was grocery shopping with my then 4 year old. There I was, this waddling, beached whale, making the mad dash through the store with my poor son hanging on for dear life, when all of a sudden I realized I didn't make it (and of course I was only about 10 feet away from the washroom entrance). I entered the washroom to clean up and the tears just bursted out of nowhere. My little boys took my hand and asked why I was crying and after I explained to him what happened, he said, in the most dearest way, "Mommy, I had accidents before and you always told me it was okay, it's just poopoo". And although I have never (thankfully) had that happen again, I at least was able to walk out of that store (smelly, but) with the biggest, proudest smile and my head held high.

 

[Lisa K]

Hey Karen,Thanks to you & the others here I feel so much better about myself; dignified & strong.Your children are the greatest. Someday I hope to find that Love. Take Care Friends. LK

 

[Guest]

I don't think I could top alpo's story. I was dying laughing, sorry.The worst thing that happened to me was my friend and I went to my house during lunch and I was sitting in the rocking chair watching TV. I though all I had to do was toot, and when I did it, it wasn't only a toot, but I made a bigger mess than I wanted to. Luckily my friend never noticed.Julia

 

[Katherine]

Well...in my case I'm 16 and I go to a public highschool, lets just say all oh 1000 or so of those highschool students know I have some kind of bowel problem.I seem to get stressed during school orals and suchthats when it is worse. I have a big presentation coming up this Thursday and not looking foward to it--40 minutes of agony..wish me luck!! (and hope the ibs eases off for a day!)

 

[Loretta]

Well guys, We are a humble bunch of people, aren't we. I've had a few embarrassing moments myself and sometimes I just re-live them in my head and it sends terrors down my spine that it will happen again. I am so careful now about where I go and who I go with. But we go on. We closed early one day at work because we lost electricity so they sent us home and I am very good friends with a guy I work with and he asked me to go to lunch before we go home and I couldn't do it. I told him I wasn't feeling well and told him that I would see him tomorrow. Well, the next day came and he told me that I had actually hurt his feelings, I felt so bad but he doesn't know what it is like to live with this fear. I tried to reassure him that I really didn't feel good but he thinks I just didn't want to go with him. I have had so many occassions like that and I know people think I try to avoid them but it's not true. I would have loved to go to lunch with him, he's a great guy but....Well,I am definitly humbled and when someone tells me they aren't feeling well I have total empathy and sympathy. Maybe this whole IBS thing makes us more understanding of other people's illnesses, who knows but we have to keep fighting it and can not let it take us over. Take care, Loretta

 

[Jay]

To Molly and eberyone else thank you very much for sharing your experiences and your support. I am really happy I found this forum.

 

[Guest]

Lisa, I can't believe I missed this post. Thank you for your comment on my kids. I just want to say to you, that when you least suspect it...WHAMO. If you're half as wonderful in "the real world" as you are here, it's only a matter of time. Of course I'm partial! And Jay, you're welcome....and I'm happy you found us too.

 

[Guest]

Julia, I have been there and done that. Most of the times where while I was at home and I was able to run to the bathroom. I know when I have the runnies or feel like I am going to when I have pressure I am very carful to not release it like I would if i felt OK. I usually can feel a warm sensation there (gross) then I can make it to the bathroom.

 

[Guest]

My first series of episodes were of the explosive kind. I was having an extremely stressful time teaching English in Morocco in a French Lycee (combination junior high/high school of spoiled rich kids from hell). I was able to reach the students' bathroom, not the teachers', but couldn't get my pants down quick enough. To top it off, it was a squat toilet. I was in stinking messy misery, listening to the girls hanging out complaining about the odor. I had to hide out until they trotted off to class before I could make my escape.Luckily, the squat toilets in Morocco have a convenient water faucet close by, and luckily that day I was wearing black pants. I was able to wash off my pants (really I had no choice), then go home and change before my afternoon class. The episodes have gotten under control (Thank God), but I will never forget my intro to IBS!