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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi,I am a new member of this board,but have been reading it for some time.I am IBS C primarily alternating with D, with G and pain as primary symptoms.I am having a severe flare-up of pain and diarrhea and feel very alone.My husband(who is not the most sympathetic in the world,he TRYS,but...)had to take our 8 yr old son to work with him today,as I am mostly doubled over with heating pad taking meds.I just wonder if their are other moms who are primary caregivers for their youngerkids who would give me suggestions......the ibs was under control for years,but past 2 years have been BAD.I feel like a bad mom when i cant take him to the zoo,park ,etc (any place without quick bathroom access) and on days of severe flare-ups we have to hang around the house..I just feel so depressed.(am seeing a good councelor for this,this helps somewhat)Also much stress from marital problems....this doesnt help!I have just ordered Mikes tapes and started them yesterday,I am hopeful they will help.I will try anything at this point!Thanks for listening .Beth
 
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There are good medicines for depression that also help IBS. Paxil for one. While I was on treatment for HCV they gave me Paxil because the chemo made me depressed. Amazingly my pain went away. I got off the treatment, quit the Paxil pain returned.Ask you GI (sounds like one of those TV drug commercials) but thsi a common treatment and may help you on both fronts.
 
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There are good medicines for depression that also help IBS. Paxil for one. While I was on treatment for HCV they gave me Paxil because the chemo made me depressed. Amazingly my pain went away. I got off the treatment, quit the Paxil pain returned.Ask you GI (sounds like one of those TV drug commercials) but thsi a common treatment and may help you on both fronts.
 

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Beth, you have a good chance of doing a number on the IBS with Mike's tapes. There is info on our forum if you haven't read things there yet. You might also want to read these two articles from the top IBS center in the US. http://www.med.unc.edu/medicine/fgidc/relax.htm http://www.med.unc.edu/medicine/fgidc/hypnosis.htm I think the counselor will help with the other issues and prescibe the right med for you if you go that route.Keep us posted.------------------Moderator of the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Anxiety and Hypnotherapy forumI work with Mike and the IBS Audio Program. www.ibshealth.com www.ibsaudioprogram.com
 

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Beth, you have a good chance of doing a number on the IBS with Mike's tapes. There is info on our forum if you haven't read things there yet. You might also want to read these two articles from the top IBS center in the US. http://www.med.unc.edu/medicine/fgidc/relax.htm http://www.med.unc.edu/medicine/fgidc/hypnosis.htm I think the counselor will help with the other issues and prescibe the right med for you if you go that route.Keep us posted.------------------Moderator of the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Anxiety and Hypnotherapy forumI work with Mike and the IBS Audio Program. www.ibshealth.com www.ibsaudioprogram.com
 

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You are right stress certainly doesn't help.I know what you mean about your husband not being understanding and accepting, mine is the same way. Unless you have IBS no one will understand. My husband thinks if I eat healthy and don't get stressed than I should be alright. Even healthy foods get me sick and as far as stress goes, there is always going to be stress in our lifes. The key is how we deal with it. You need some kind of outlet to relieve the stress, meditation and excerise helps. Although diet and stress are key factors remember they're not the cause.I do know what you are going through. I had a baby two months ago and my ibs has been at its worst. I'm nursing and alot of the times when I'm feeding her I have to put her down and run to the bathroom. Sometimes I have to feed her in the bathroom when my attacks are long and then I don't have the engery because I'm in pain to talk to her so I put her in her bouncer and try to rock her to sleep. I feel Like a bad Mom because I should be talking to her more often but because my ibs is so bad lately its very differcult to take care of her, but thank God he gives me the strenght to take care of her. I am doing everything possible to take care of myself and I know this will pass. It will get better. You need to have a postive attuide that is very important. Believe me I know its hard. We all have our days. Just take one day at a time.Have you examined you diet. Maybe you should try keeping a food diary and also write down the time you eat and the times your attacks occur. I find this very helpful. I heard Mike's tapes are very good. I don't know to much about them only from what I have read on this board. Alot of people rave about them.Until your Ibs is somewhat under control maybe you could do somethings with your son at home or close to home so this way if you have an attack the bathroom will be close by.I know when I go out I try not to eat out and I will eat either a couple hours before or wait until I get home. I hope you feel better and remember things will get better
 

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You are right stress certainly doesn't help.I know what you mean about your husband not being understanding and accepting, mine is the same way. Unless you have IBS no one will understand. My husband thinks if I eat healthy and don't get stressed than I should be alright. Even healthy foods get me sick and as far as stress goes, there is always going to be stress in our lifes. The key is how we deal with it. You need some kind of outlet to relieve the stress, meditation and excerise helps. Although diet and stress are key factors remember they're not the cause.I do know what you are going through. I had a baby two months ago and my ibs has been at its worst. I'm nursing and alot of the times when I'm feeding her I have to put her down and run to the bathroom. Sometimes I have to feed her in the bathroom when my attacks are long and then I don't have the engery because I'm in pain to talk to her so I put her in her bouncer and try to rock her to sleep. I feel Like a bad Mom because I should be talking to her more often but because my ibs is so bad lately its very differcult to take care of her, but thank God he gives me the strenght to take care of her. I am doing everything possible to take care of myself and I know this will pass. It will get better. You need to have a postive attuide that is very important. Believe me I know its hard. We all have our days. Just take one day at a time.Have you examined you diet. Maybe you should try keeping a food diary and also write down the time you eat and the times your attacks occur. I find this very helpful. I heard Mike's tapes are very good. I don't know to much about them only from what I have read on this board. Alot of people rave about them.Until your Ibs is somewhat under control maybe you could do somethings with your son at home or close to home so this way if you have an attack the bathroom will be close by.I know when I go out I try not to eat out and I will eat either a couple hours before or wait until I get home. I hope you feel better and remember things will get better
 

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Beth,I don't know if I can offer any helpful advice but I did manage to raise two kids with IBS C/D ( me, not them). There were times where it interfered ,like having to leave my sons school play early,missing a few baseball games etc. But I think I got more upset than they did. My husband traveled alot so I was mainly responsible for everything that involved the kids,the house,the dog. You name it. I don't know how I made it through ,especially since we lived in a very small house with ONE bathroom. But I did make it through and so did they. They are in thier 20s now and I still have IBS. I know things seem difficult for you now but basically we just have to do the best we can to get through each day and if our families know we love them they shouldn't love us any less because we are sick. As far as husbands (or anyone else) that don't or won't understand they are really the ones with the problem and I guess there isn't much we can do about that. Good luck hope you feel better soon. LIN
 

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Beth,I don't know if I can offer any helpful advice but I did manage to raise two kids with IBS C/D ( me, not them). There were times where it interfered ,like having to leave my sons school play early,missing a few baseball games etc. But I think I got more upset than they did. My husband traveled alot so I was mainly responsible for everything that involved the kids,the house,the dog. You name it. I don't know how I made it through ,especially since we lived in a very small house with ONE bathroom. But I did make it through and so did they. They are in thier 20s now and I still have IBS. I know things seem difficult for you now but basically we just have to do the best we can to get through each day and if our families know we love them they shouldn't love us any less because we are sick. As far as husbands (or anyone else) that don't or won't understand they are really the ones with the problem and I guess there isn't much we can do about that. Good luck hope you feel better soon. LIN
 

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Beth, I believe you've done the best thing by starting Mike's tapes, they sure made a big difference in my life. I can tell from your post that you are guilty as many of us of putting your health and needs after others. You must help yourself before you can do for others. You have the tapes, use them as much as possible even if you listen at bedtime like I do. The other thing you need is a big dose of "can do" and "positive vibes". Excercise, hobbies, laughter and fun can help you with relaxation also and you'll find yourself getting into the children's activities more and more. You can do it!!
Good luck, Norb[This message has been edited by norbert46 (edited 08-08-2001).]
 

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Beth, I believe you've done the best thing by starting Mike's tapes, they sure made a big difference in my life. I can tell from your post that you are guilty as many of us of putting your health and needs after others. You must help yourself before you can do for others. You have the tapes, use them as much as possible even if you listen at bedtime like I do. The other thing you need is a big dose of "can do" and "positive vibes". Excercise, hobbies, laughter and fun can help you with relaxation also and you'll find yourself getting into the children's activities more and more. You can do it!!
Good luck, Norb[This message has been edited by norbert46 (edited 08-08-2001).]
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Norb,Lin,thanks so much for your responses.Lin,you are right,kids just have to adapt to whatever mom's health problems are....when I think about it realistically,my 8 yr old is turning out fine so far!!Also-Norb-you make a very good point about taking care of ME first,I tend to use all my (limited)energy for my DH and my son and then no time left for me!Good reminder-I got my son in childcare today and had a fun outing with my sister in law,who is really great.(she understands )so-thanks and I will make it my goal to take care of myself better.thanks.Beth
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
Norb,Lin,thanks so much for your responses.Lin,you are right,kids just have to adapt to whatever mom's health problems are....when I think about it realistically,my 8 yr old is turning out fine so far!!Also-Norb-you make a very good point about taking care of ME first,I tend to use all my (limited)energy for my DH and my son and then no time left for me!Good reminder-I got my son in childcare today and had a fun outing with my sister in law,who is really great.(she understands )so-thanks and I will make it my goal to take care of myself better.thanks.Beth
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
Thanks to Big Mike,Eric,and Victoria,I really needed some encouragement,and you all helped a lot!Victoria,sorry you are having such problems with your baby being so young....you show a lot of "spunk" and are handling the situation better than I would!I am going to use the tapes,take more time for ME,and Eric,thanks for the links and info.Pardon any computer errors, I am a "newbee" and not so good at the computer.Sending good vibes your way.Sincerely,Beth
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
Thanks to Big Mike,Eric,and Victoria,I really needed some encouragement,and you all helped a lot!Victoria,sorry you are having such problems with your baby being so young....you show a lot of "spunk" and are handling the situation better than I would!I am going to use the tapes,take more time for ME,and Eric,thanks for the links and info.Pardon any computer errors, I am a "newbee" and not so good at the computer.Sending good vibes your way.Sincerely,Beth
 

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You poor, poor thing. I can relate, although my problem isn't anything as serious as yours. I have a 2 and a half year old, and there are days when I just can't leave the couch! I eat about half a bottle of Tums a day! I can also relate about the marital problems affecting your IBS. I tend to get my worst attacks when my husband has a day off. Sad, but true. I took up yoga about 6 months ago, and it has really helped me feel better (emotionally, that is). I would recommend getting a yoga instructional video, and do it when you have quiet time. I definitely feel for you, because I know how terribly difficult it is to be sick with a little one.Best of luck.
 

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You poor, poor thing. I can relate, although my problem isn't anything as serious as yours. I have a 2 and a half year old, and there are days when I just can't leave the couch! I eat about half a bottle of Tums a day! I can also relate about the marital problems affecting your IBS. I tend to get my worst attacks when my husband has a day off. Sad, but true. I took up yoga about 6 months ago, and it has really helped me feel better (emotionally, that is). I would recommend getting a yoga instructional video, and do it when you have quiet time. I definitely feel for you, because I know how terribly difficult it is to be sick with a little one.Best of luck.
 
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