My body is screaming at me that it is stressed and anxious and needs some changes. My heart palpitations have returned and one yesterday was so bad I blacked out. I called the doc this morning and she is out of the office all week. The nurse told me that since I am already on heart meds and the palps are not new, I can probably wait to be seen unless it happens again. I really hope I NEVER have one that bad again. It has scared the bejeezus out of me and I am now a nervous wreck. I was having a spell of anxiety before, it has just gotten worse.I try to keep everything under control and I was doing so well for quite a long time. But now, all the stress signs are back, daily stomach pain, nerves, heart palpitations. Ok, now I am starting to cry. I don't get this down very often, but I sometimes think that if my kids didn't need me around, I would be better off dead. I am so tired of never feeling good, of never being able to just get in the car and go wherever by myself (I have the need to have someone with me). I get a good start on lifestyle changes and eat better, exercise, meditate, but then for some reason the old bad habits creep back in and all my good intentions are out the window. I know my heart is giving me a warning and telling me to change my lifestyle and get a grip on the free floating anxiety and stress NOW. The next time may be the real thing, a heart attack. Then what?