Oh, you poor thing!! It's terrible that you have been sick for so long. Maybe it would be worth spending a bit more time with people that do understand your illness? It's still embarrassing sometimes, but at least you'd be out a bit more. I hate to hear you say that life isn't worth living. Feeling like this cannot help the situation at all. Is there anything that makes you happy? It's horrible being sick all the time, but you need to find something that you enjoy. It's difficult when your family (or some of your family) is unsupportive though. Do you think that a course of antidepressants may help? This may be an option worth exploring. I have also read on this board (somewhere!) that antidepressants can reduce the symptoms of IBS.I know I haven't made any real suggestions, but I just couldn't read this post then not respond. There are people out there that care about you and understand your illness. I really hope that you feel better.